A milestone has come and gone. Three days ago was my daughter’s first day of Kindergarten. As I presented her to her new teacher, her new desk, her new environment, I felt a bit lost in the hoopla all around me. There were cameras (including video), swarms of parents, and a general bustle of excitement and uneasiness. Where I felt lost was in my emotions. I glanced through the room and the hallways and noticed moms with tears in their eyes. Many were consoling each other with gasps of “can you BELIEVE it?!?!” As I quickly surveyed my internal condition, I realized I didn’t feel this way at all . . . then I was confused.
My daughter’s name is Zoe. Zoe means life. In fact, she will refer to herself as “Zoe full of life” and it is for good reason. Wide eyed and expectant, she is determined to make the most of this 5 year old life of hers and, well . . . Kindergarten is the next step. As her momma, I found myself aligning with her heart. She wasn’t sad, scared, intimidated. She was elated. Watching her, I was proud, excited and filled with joy at her expectation and wonder as she discovered all that this “5 year old” experience was going to be.
Later though, confusion started to set in for me. Every time I told someone that it was “Zoe’s first day of school” they looked at me like I just told them my dog ran away. “Are you OK?!”, they would ask, concerned for my broken heart. Um . . . “yeah” (???) Is that ok? I wondered.
For the last three days I have wondered about this. I have asked the Lord His perspective and, as it turns out, I’m pretty encouraged by what I feel like He has shared with me. God’s view is so different from ours. He sees everything in light of eternity. When you look at a moment in time (such as Zoe Frank’s first day of school) it is a minute component in the everything of God’s universe and His great and perfect plan. What I felt the Lord encourage me in, on the flip side, was that He was THERE! He was also very present in that precious moment, reveling and sharing in Zoe’s joy. Participating wholeheartedly in that “milestone” – blip on the radar screen of the universe though it may be.
Our joys are His joys. His joys are to be ours. Our Father celebrates our victories and shares in our sorrows – just as we do for our own children. I long to be so connected with the heartbeat of the Father. It seems to me, that for us, it would be good practice to “try this at home” with our kids. Heaven’s pictures are encapsulated all around us. Shadows and types of God’s heart and Kingdom are everywhere. As life on earth passes like a vapor, I pray that the eternal world of the God we serve becomes so real to us that we lay hold of His perspective and carry His emotions as our very own.
Jennifer Frank lives in Murfreesboro TN with her amazing husband of (almost) 9 years and 2 beautiful children (three actually – however their newest baby is of the dog species). Discovering God is her greatest joy and aspiration. Called to hear from heaven and transmit it’s songs, worship is her primary love – aside from Jesus Himself and stewarding this precious family God has given to her.